Reflections.

Lately, I have been very negative or that is what Papa told me. I don't mean to be negative, but I guess idle times call for some introspections. Everyday is the same, a reflection of the previous and I like that. My mind is numb. No not in a depressing manner, not in a negative manner either. Its as if it is shut. Do you ever have that feeling, where you are not particularly excited about anything and at the same time nothing upsets you. I know I have sounded negative in my past few blogs, but I guess its good sometimes to be that as well, you find out more about yourself.

Yesterday, just like that, I stared at myself in the mirror for very long, the person staring back at me was me and yet seemed so much older. I don't mind ageing in-fact I am quite happy about it. Happy; because I lived those wonderful years, I am satisfied with my life, except for losing Mama so early, there is nothing else I would change. I have a wonderful father, greatest grandparent, a beautiful sister and a loving yet already senile husband and so, I feel like this is what I am here for. Not to do something very big, not to conquer the world, not to have my name written in the papers, but, to just be with everyone around me. To love them to cherish them. I no longer find happiness in worldly pleasure except for good food, I no longer find the necessity to beautify everything around me because everything around me is beautiful the way it is.

If I back track in my mind, I have no regrets, at least not yet and I am hoping that in the future also, I will feel as content and happy with my life as I do today. So, as long as the sun is shining, birds chirping, rivers flowing, everyone is in good health...all is well, I am well.