I remember her as a toddler running around in piggy tails, I remember her as nerd in her pink pyjamas studying all night, I remember her as a little girl singing sitting on the dressing table eating and drumming at the same time, I remember her poking scissors in the plug points and crying later for she got a an electric shock, I remember her swirling in her frocks and singing the whole day in her shirley voice .
There are numerous memories I have of her, and endless things we have shared. Like once, when Mama and Papa had gone to some dinner party, we took Mama's vanity box and put her make up on (the result was more scary than beautiful, as you can imagine) We ran around the house pretending to be He-Man and superman with our capes made from towels. The endless cat fights we had over stupid things like who gets more Maggie Noodles. The competitiveness over who learns how to ride a bicycle first. The weapons or strategic plans we made just in case thieves entered our house (which included a horrible mocktail made with chilli powder and all the horrible spices, slingshot made with dust filled in paper...just in case). I remember, her and I always fighting over who is going to spend more time with Mama and Papa. We both are not the kinds who would express much to each other but we will stand by each other like rocks. We are always saying the meanest of things to each other but will not stand anyone else saying those same things. Dad for one is a victim of our ways and always complains about how we both are the best lawyers for each other. These are the small things that might not matter to anyone, but for both of us these things define us. We have a love hate relationship and as much as I hate to say she is my best friend (ewww...I can't believe I just wrote that...now its official, in writing)
Now, she is a 23 year old lady, who is independent enough to travel in mumbai trains, who is working, who even has a boyfriend.The things is, I have always been very protective about my little girl. For me she is like my daughter, so, when she told me that she is seeing someone, my first reaction was disapproval. Even though, I was once in her shoes, I guess when it comes to our loved ones, a black godmother takes over us, who only makes you worry for the worst. I know she is a smart and intelligent girl, who is wise enough to know the right from from wrong, I still can't help but worry. I haven't met the guy, so, I am not very approving of him yet. For me, she is that little girl, who would often ask me for my advise on which dress to buy. Now, she is all grown up and found a boyfriend for herself... on her own. Honestly, I am not sure if I would be nice to her boyfriend, considering he is dating my little sister, and chances are if she gets hurt it would be most probably him which I cannot stand. I know, I know that I should understand and give them a chance considering I didn't listen to anyone when I was in her shoes, but I have seen her get hurt once and if that happens again I don't know if I would be able to handle it. These days I literally think of ways to torture her new boyfriend just in case he hurts my little sister (an empty mind is a devils workshop) I even have a few ideas, chinese torture, or how about hanging him upside down over a bucket of crab and lobsters, or even better rubbing chilly in he eyes and burying him alive (Mohaahaaha...that was my evil laugh) these are just few of the ideas but I have more, I won't bore all of you with it anymore. So, Dimpi if you are reading this please tell your boyfriend, to be AFRAID, TO BE VERY AFRAID and sleep with one eye open. :)
Anyone else reading this, please free to give me more suggestion on torturing. And NO I don't want to listen to how he could be a nice guy, give him a chance, or Ankita mind you own business etc etc etc. :)
I love you Mottu.
Nanhi
ReplyDeleteDo I find a shade of excitement and sense of celebration in that your kid girl has finally grown up rather than the actual anxiety? there appears to be a dichotomy in you approach!If you truly are looking for the happiness of the kidoo then I thought you would be more interested in knowing as to what all this HO HALLA is about rather than proceeding with a pre-fixed set of ideas on how to hot up the show (Let me see the reaction coming on your face)and harbouring the sadictic thought of inflicting the agony of thoughts and creating the dread in the guy (You know he would be reading your blogs too). Love is sharing and caring. Both are necessities to be bestowed by the elders, and I thought you said you are protecting the kidoo like a mother hen. So where lies the dividing line between fear and faith,cofidence and black godmother ,divnity and virtual reality, facts and dreams,idealism vs pragmatism, heart vs logical mind and capabilty to accept the inevitable than the wishful creation of imaginative sequence of events. I know for sure the scare tactics being induldged by you are more for building an excitement in the events sorrounding the kidoo rather than actual strategic plan to throw the guy off gaurds . Let us wish happiness to the happenings and let kiddoo take her flight on her own unassisted wings and feel the freedom of rocking the world in her own terms albeit maintaining the flock together--Papu
Dear Papa,
ReplyDeleteI have to confess that there might be a hint a of excitement over my sister happiness which has been disguised as a anger and fear. I will not deny that that in-fact fear is prevalent in my thought. I do wish for my little kid to fly unsupported explore the world on her own and will also not deny that I have wished for nothing but for her to stand on her feet. (which she has done very gracefully so far) As an elder sister it is but inevitable to be prepared for the worst. I am sure you know it, that I am completely incapable of actually putting such things in action, I guess in my own way, I am trying for my sister's boyfriend to realise that relationships between the both is now not only restricted to them but now involves everyone. I am not trying to inflict fear in the poor guy, who I am sure is a little scared already, but add a sense of humour and describe in my own way that I am scared for my little sister's happiness which now partially lies in his hands.
As elders we all want our young ones to have all the happiness in the world along with all the possibilities of hope. Faith is a strong word which takes time to build, I do wish to be able to meet the boy in person and build up the faith between him and I. At the same time confidence in him will only appear once I see them together, logic sometimes will always have mixed reactions when overwhelmed with love and emotions. This my dear father in not only I speaking but anyone to everyone who has been there in that situation, will be there or already has been. I remember not so long back someone elder to me feeling the same way about the boy I was dating who is now my husband. With time one grows and with time one learns. It is not for me to throw him off guard but for him to stand up and fight back for his love (metaphorically) for life will throw such challenges (such as I) in their relationship which they have to face together.
Ankita,
ReplyDeleteYour excitement for Chubby's(your mottu's) new step in her life is palpable in your blog. The attempt to disguise this excitement with anger and fear might be understandable, knowing Chubby's track record in the path of love. But lets not judge me too early, what say ??
Let me tell you I understand every bit of your feeling except the torture bit..
From what Chubby has described you, as a very sensitive emotional woman, I would concur with her reading heart-pourings in your blog.
I can't wait see what torture techniques you have in store for me... This one's bound to be interesting and full of surprises.
But wait someone named nanhi is going to torture THE RAMROD.. really.. no really.. O C'mon...
Will c u when I c u,
Shriram